A Gift for Phil
by noahcomemidnight
Summary: Found this old fanfiction from a while back and decided to post it. Phan. Rated T for stuff. Might have posted this before under a different title...? Also, happy birthday to my son Phillip Lester.
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's Note:_** ** _Hey guys! So I found my old laptop and resurrected it to find so many unpublished fics and fic ideas. Most of them were crack fics, but this one was actually legit and I read through it. And I cried. To 2014 me who wrote this, what the hell were you thinking, you sick, cruel, twisted bastard?!_**

* * *

One-

"Dan?" Phil called out tiredly, his voice breaking the silence in the flat. _Where was Dan?_ He knew it wasn't a big deal, because he was probably out of the flat for once doing something semi-productive.

Sure enough, a ping came from his hand where he held his phone and signalling a text from his friend.

 **Out for once. Don't freak.**

Phil sighed, before wondering why Dan _was_ leaving the flat. Was it boredom, or was it a special occasion-? He yawned, checking the time on his phone. Ten fifty-seven on the thirty-first of January. He rubbed his eyes underneath his glasses. _The thirty-first of January?_ He mentally facepalmed himself, once he finished analysing the date. _It's his birthday. Dan was out buying him something. But at this hour? Dan was rarely up before noon._

Phil's mind began to roam as he began breakfast with his "Frosted Shreddies" combination. _What could Dan possibly be getting him? Why was Dan up so early to get him a present?_ Phil tried to clear his head; however, it wasn't working, so he decided to play some Pokémon on his old Game Boy Colour. Phil went back to his room, taking his cereal bowl with him, prepared to defeat the Elite Four again, and catch a Mew.

Before he could turn on his Game Boy, he heard something. He cowered in his bed, pulling his covers above his head. _What if it's a serial killer? What would be his intentions for killing me?_ There was some noise outside in the kitchen, and he remained where he was.

"Phil?" Came a thick northern accent, and Phil removed the covers from his head, before proceeding to roll out of bed and leave his room.

"Chris? Peej? What are you two doing here? I thought you were serial killers or something."

"We came here to hang out with you on your birthday." Chris said, his hands shoved in his hoodie pockets.

"Dan also said to say, 'Sorry', because he has to do something important, but to give you your present." Peej handed Phil the blue bag that he'd been holding.

Phil wondered what Dan could possibly be doing, but shook any thoughts from his mind, as he opened the bag and pulled the green tissue paper out. Inside he saw a large ball of golden fur, and he pulled it out. It was a lion hat with extremely long ear covers with pockets large enough to place your hands in. Phil put on the wonderful hat to cover his untamed bed hair, and instantly knew he would never be taking it off again.


	2. Chapter 2

Two-

Dan knew that Phil hated him, because everyone did. He had his black sweatshirt hood up, and ear buds in his ears, trying to drown out the world's hatred towards him today. He had decided to get that lion hat for Phil, in hope that he would accept it. He couldn't see Phil open it, for he had to carry through with his big plans, but he could imagine the disapproval on his face when he opened it.

 ** _He said "Will you defeat them,  
your demons, and all the non-believers,  
the plans that they have made?"  
"Because one day I'll leave you,  
a phantom to lead you in the summer,  
to join The Black Parade."_**

He remembered first starting his YouTube channel after being inspired by the song, and wanting to save the people in the world that were just like him. Over the past couple of years, however, Dan had slowly stopped helping his viewers, and they had begun to help him. However, they couldn't help him forever, because the inevitable would happen.

 **"** **Depression is a side effect of dying."**

His world was collapsing around him, hatred pouring through every crevice slowly drowning him, because he had no idea how to swim in the sea that engulfed him. He didn't bother with therapists like he'd done in the past, because they provided little help and they fed false ideas about the world. He didn't bother telling anyone at all, really, because it wasn't _his_ world that was collapsing around him. Everyone shared the world equally, and he didn't feel like bothering anyone, because out of all of the billions of persons on this earth, what would it matter if one died?

 ** _I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone.  
I long for that feeling to not feel at all.  
The higher I get, the lower I'll sink.  
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim._**

He'd arrived at his destination, and he pulled his ear buds out, as well as took his hood off of his head. He knew one way Phil would appreciate him, and he was going to do it now.


	3. Chapter 3

Three-

Phil was on the couch with Peej and Chris, in the midst of a heated battle of which was a better starter Pokémon, when he felt a buzz in his hand.

 **Can you meet me at the Westminster Bridge in twenty minutes? I have a surprise you'll really appreciate.**

Phil raised a brow, but nonetheless excused himself to get ready. He threw on the first shirt he happened to find, which was Dan's High School Musical Wildcats one, and chose a pair of skinny jeans and converse, before placing his lion hat back on. He came back out to the living room, to find that Peej and Chris were gone. Phil continued out, grabbing a black sweater.

He exited the flat and was greeted with a brisk, grey early afternoon, the typical English weather. The bridge was just ten minutes away, so he could make it with just minutes to spare. He dodged around the slightly crowded streets, and he was just approaching the bridge when his phone vibrated in his back pocket. He picked up the call, knowing it was Dan.

"Hey Da-"

"Stay right where you are."

"What are you-"

"Please Phil."

Phil glanced around, before seeing Dan in the middle. He was staring right at Phil with an expression that was masked by the distance and his brown fringe.

"Phil, check the lion hat pockets."

"A-alright."

Phil stuck his hand into the hat's left paw pocket and found a messily folded piece of paper. It suddenly struck him, and he started moving quickly to where Dan was.

"Phil." He said shortly.

"Dan, don't you dare." Phil's voice cracked slightly. "Please."

"Goodbye, Phil. You were the closest thing I had to a friend, and I'd like to thank you for trying."

"Tell me you're joking. Please tell me you're joking."

"Bye Phil."

The line went silent, and when Phil went to check it, Dan had hung up. When Phil looked up to see Dan was kidding, Dan wasn't across the way on the bridge anymore.

He was already gone.

Little did Phil know, Dan had social-phobia, which made sense why Dan hated being judged, hated social situations, and had the intense fear that everyone hated him. Phil didn't know this until after he'd called 9-9-9 and run down to see his friend. Dan's head had been bashed in and basically his entire body was broken, bones sticking out of his pierced skin. Dan had been rushed to the hospital, even though he was gone way before Phil had even gotten to him. The doctor at the hospital had sat Phil down and spoken to him about Dan's past medical records that had most likely lead up to this point in time. This is when Phil found out about Dan having social-phobia. This is also when Phil pulled the note out of his hat pocket and read it.

 ** _Phil,_**

 ** _I know you hate me, and that's why I gave you the much-appreciated birthday gift of my ceasing existence. Your world was weighed down by me, and I felt as though I was too much of a burden to handle. Thank you for being the closest thing I ever had to a friend._**

 ** _And thanks for being the closest thing I will have ever had._**

 ** _Happy twenty-seventh birthday, Phil. I hope it was great._**

 ** _~Dan_**

 ** _Oh, and one more thing. I love you._**

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 ** _Author's Note: Hey guys. I haven't been on the internet for a long while because I've been trying to figure out my life. I may be on and off now and then, as a result of my life choices and responsibilities. Hope you understand._**

 ** _-Crash Cola (noahcomemidnight)_**


End file.
